How changing your mindset and dropping the diet mentality can positively affect your mental health
Brandy, a nutrition and lifestyle coach is here to discuss a topic on #tipsytuesday that most of us women may struggle with, the diet mentality. It can be hard to stop with all the rules you’ve likely been following for years. Every diet has rules. The question is how do you break free?
Brandy, a nutrition and lifestyle coach is here to discuss a topic on #tipsytuesday that most of us women may struggle with, the diet mentality. It can be hard to stop with all the rules you’ve likely been following for years. Every diet has rules. The question is how do you break free?
Even macro tracking has rules. However, at least with macro tracking, it can teach you one very valuable tool... portion control. I believe that is one of the best benefits of macro tracking.
But how do you let go of labeling food good vs bad? How do you start eating more carbs? How do you stop restricting yourself to then binge on it later? How do you eat before bed? How do put time aside for yourself? How do you stop over-exercising? With so many rules, so now it’s time to start breaking some of these rules.
If you want to feel free, you have to start letting go of the rules.
Breaking the rules can have you feeling shame and guilt, no different than overeating. It will take time but all you need to do is start.
Changing your mindset is a great place to begin. Stop thinking with a scarcity mindset and switch to living and thinking in abundance.
Those who live with a scarcity mindset tend to have rules, restrictions, guilt, and shame. They will think about the past and dwell on a binge or cheat meal. They will seek control and resort to negative self-talk. Procrastination takes over, driven by a self-sabotaging ego that fuels fear and anxiety. Those who live with a scarcity mindset tend to carry a lot of self-doubts and strive for perfection.
Switch to an abundance mindset, you will think more about consistency, flexibility, and sustainability. You will have more compassion for yourself, learn from your experiences and focus on the present. You will begin to let go of what you can not control and lean into the unknown. You will have more self-confidence and acknowledge when mistakes happen. The best part, you give yourself permission to live and to trust yourself.
The next thing you can do is change the language you have around food. There are no good foods and there are no bad foods. There will always be a better choice. Accept that you are not a good person for choosing to eat salad just like you are NOT a bad person for choosing to eat cake.
How silly does it sound... I’m bad about eating cake? Seriously? This does not make you bad. It makes you human. The diet mentality will have you believe you are wrong, bad, unhealthy, nondeserving but this is simply not true.
You have to start listening to your body. You have to start trusting your body.
You have to change your mindset.
You have to start making peace with food. Carbs do not make you fat. OVER indulging, bingeing can lead to weight gain but what leads to overeating, to begin with? That is where you need to start. If you are not eating enough or if you RESTRICT certain food groups you will likely feel more hungry and will desire whatever it is you tell yourself you can’t have until you give in (aka - living with a scarcity mindset).
Change the approach and change your mindset. There is no diet out there that will help you with this. You must be willing to allow yourself to listen to your body. Are you hungry? Are you full? Are you craving food because you restrict certain choices?
There are many myths out there when it comes to nutrition. The first step is to get more educated and you can do this by hiring a nutrition coach. Look for one that has experience along with knowledge. Ask for referrals, jump on a call and ask the coach questions. Don’t fall into marketing gimmicks promising results.
Diet mentality, it did not happen overnight. Neither will a change in your mindset. If you have always been on a diet or tried various ones, you will be stuck in a belief system that taught you nothing except to fear food or lay a foundation for disordered eating mentality.
You can use metrics like macros to help you figure out calories if you like but again, it’s only a method of tracking. It’s no different than journaling food. Both create awareness. From there, change your mindset. Change the language and how you speak to yourself and learn to trust yourself more. It’s about keeping your eyes on your plate and doing what is best for you. Comparisons will break you. What works for that person will not necessarily work for you.
Diets are not the answer to fat loss. YOU are the answer.
You have to be willing to let go, dig deep and put the effort in. Do you realize that you are a bi-product of the choices you’ve made over time? This is usually a result of the diet mentality. Always on a diet, never actually trying to listen to your body and figuring out what is truly best for you.
You will become a healthier human by changing your mindset. You will feel better and by default likely look better too. Mindset is a big piece of the puzzle and the key to helping you drop the diet mentality. Lean into the unknown, trust yourself, be honest with yourself, have an open mind and stop procrastinating.
#TipsyTuesday post submitted by Brandy Schroeder
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TIPSY TUESDAY | The Importance of Contracts for Sponsorship Work - Bud + Bloom
So you’ve started your own business and you’re excited. You’re out there hustling to establish yourself and before you know it, people are excited about your business too!
Photo | Nicole Constante
So you’ve started your own business and you’re excited. You’re out there hustling to establish yourself and before you know it, people are excited about your business too! This is all fantastic until you notice a trend – people are excited enough to try your product or service but have a good understanding of the way the saturated entrepreneurial world works so they’re asking you to provide your expertise for exposure rather than income. At this point you need to do three things.
1) Research the heck out of this client. What kind of exposure are they offering? Will this exposure reach your target market? Is that reach going to create new leads or direct people to your sales funnel?
2) Figure out what it will take to balance the value of your product/service with the value of their exposure.
3) Put it all into a contract.
Like most entrepreneurs, this is a lesson I had to learn the hard way. When I first started up my boutique floral design studio, Bud + Bloom, I was thrilled when I was asked to do a number of centrepieces for a private outdoor event. The client stated their needs and wanted to keep everything local so I foraged for four hours the day before the event, processed all the materials for two, drove out an hour and a half to where the event was being held, and spent another two hours assembling the centrepieces on site. They were big, beautiful, and an excellent addition to my portfolio. They were also taken down about twenty minutes into the event because the weather turned and they had to disassemble everything to put up tents. I was devastated. It was the first time I had put in a day’s work and had nothing to show for it. Including no contract. Why? Because the clients were my friends.
Photo | Corinne Kutz
Read this and re-read this, then re-read it again:
FRIENDS AND FAMILY SHOULD NOT BE EXEMPT FROM CONTRACTS
While it may feel a bit awkward to get into the practice at first, it will get easier with time and you will gain a better understanding of your worth and your targets as a result. Plus, it doesn’t compare to the awkwardness you may feel when it comes to negotiating that contract.
If you do the above steps and hit a wall at step two because you realize the value just does not balance out, you have two options.
Adjust what you’re offering to better match the exposure value.
Ask for more. Whether that’s more social media mentions, tickets to the event so you can network (I always include this), better recognition/signage, accommodation coverage etc.
The awkwardness you may feel is likely stemming from fear and self-doubt because you don’t want to offend anyone, be rejected, or potentially lose a client down the line. However, knowing your worth and being able to assert it does not do that. To the contrary, it makes people take you more seriously because you’re showing that you take yourself and your business seriously.
Photo | Jessica Storm Photography
If you do end up losing them and your requests were reasonable, don’t stress! Instead, ask yourself what the likelihood of them paying for your product/service later on would be? Unfortunately, some people really do want something for nothing. The good news is, those are not your people.
Which brings me to my final point:
only provide sponsorship services once per client
I think this speaks for itself. Within the first year of business, exposure is incredibly valuable. However, if you continue to do things for exchanges other than adequate pay, you are unintentionally defining your value as such.
As far as what that contract actually looks like, or if you have any questions, please feel free to email me at budandbloom.yeg@gmail.com. I truly hope this helps all the business babes out there better realize their worth and better claim their boss title.
Nora Salem
TIPSY TUESDAY | Conscious Leadership
My name is Lilly and I work with entrepreneurs and established businesses on how to better move their businesses, their impact, as well as their personal lives forward.
My name is Lilly and I work with entrepreneurs and established businesses on how to better move their businesses, their impact, as well as their personal lives forward. I’ve worked with some of the best leaders at some of the world’s top think tanks, including the World Health Organization (of the United Nations), published peer review work in the sciences, and taught numerous workshops on health, mindset, and leadership.
Although I started out consulting in health policy and health financing, I’ve learned that the nature of my work with driven, motivated, and self actualizing individuals has actually turned into coaching. Leaders and budding leaders at work and in their communities who serve and give a lot of value - i.e., conscious leaders - are always wanting to be coached on how to become better versions of themselves. To that end, when YEG Boss Babes approached me to write a blog a few weeks ago, I thought an apt topic would be conscious leadership!
In today’s fast paced world, good leadership is more important than ever. A multitude of leadership topics tend to focus on the problem on the surface - teams not sticking together, or leaders not delgating their work. These are important topics, but I feel that long lasting personal, cultural and organizational change comes only when we begin looking at changes coming from within, i.e., within each leader herself.
Internal change, self awareness, and self growth are key to becoming better versions of ourselves. I could easily write a thesis on this (and talk for hours on it!) (and yes, I have done this! 😋), so with great difficulty, I selected just four bullet points here. Connect with me as a lot of my work does involve mindset and change coming from within.
This article is a small summary of some of the good leadership that I’ve seen over the course of my career. So whether you’re an established influencer in your field, just getting out of college, or thinking of making a career jump, I hope it gives you some food for thought, and adds to your day! Reach out to me if you have any questions. 😊
1. Conscious leaders are guided by a mission
Conscious leaders are guided by a mission, vision, and/or purpose that is bigger than themselves. There is a larger than life aspect to being guided by something that’s larger than just our own likes or dislikes, or what our own needs may be at a certain point in time. For example, JK Rowling was driven by what seems to have been a passion for infusing fantasy, character development, and morality into story telling, so much so that she kept writing even when she was homeless and a single parent. Elon Musk’s “work” or “products” may be tech oriented, but he has stated that it is his desire to help humanity that causes him to keep inventing, time and time again, after what were temporary failures or standstills.
Now, I’m not saying that you should voluntarily seek out a new life full of challenges, or that leaders only become so when forged by fire, but there is truth in the fact that winners are only winners by virtue of having persevered in spite of challenging times. Yes or yes?
I’m sure that you’ve experienced a few of your own! Having a vision bigger than your present circumstances helps you keep going even in rough times. When you’ve connected to your passion, and mission, you can hold your attention on it, and on anything, with your will will. This kind of discipline of adhering to your purpose will help you persevere in ways that a mere “work ethic” or a “need to pay the bills” wont.
Mission, vision, and purpose will take you to the end, get you to the top, get you through the finish line. Focus on honing your ability to connect with and be led by them, and you can go further than ever before.
2. Conscious leaders focus on themselves.
What??
Yes, you heard me right. :) Conscious leaders do this!
By which I mean that conscious leaders look inward — they work on being self aware, and on acknowledging their innermost motivations for wanting or doing something. Then they can evaluate this in light of their purpose and vision (see point #1).
Leaders work on themsevles — they know that the better they become, the better their work and ability to contribute become (see point #4!). And when things go wrong, rather than playing the blame game, or getting defensive, or hiding under a rock (although we may all have wanted to hide under a rock at some point!) — they look at what role they played, and always include themselves in the troubleshooting process. In short, by focusing on themselves, they can take greater responsibility for who they are and the energy that they contribute to the greater whole.
If you’re still with me, you can probably see that doing the above takes a lot of humility! And it’s true, it takes a humble person to put themselves under the microscope. It takes self awareness to understand what is under the microscope. And it takes vulnerability to admit to onself what one is really thinking, doing and being.
Have you ever had a great teacher, friend, or boss at some point, who, in spite of their power, position, or influence, was so humble and so open to bettering themselves, that it was so attractive? Ensuring you have great mentors and people around you who do this as well will keep you humble, great leader.
Leaders who are conscious develp a habit of focusing on themselves. By better understanding their own motivations, they are often keen observers and students of others. I work with leaders who want to become better versions of themselves, because they understand that at a high level, this is the only way that they’ll keep growing and contributing. Can you see how a keen awareness of yourself, and then of the people around you and of society at large can help you not only in managing your relationsihps, but also growing in your career, and in understanding societal trends?
3. Conscious leaders are decisive
Conscious leaders are decisive individuals. These are not the ones who waddle through life, fearful of committing to something, or of taking a stand for something.
When a leader has that sense of purpose (see point #1), they can choose behaviour and actions that take them closer to that purpose. For example, it’s not uncommon for someone to choose a temporary paycut, or something less prestigious, for the chance to gain skills or learn from mentors. A lot of highly successful people have left what was once comfortable, and perhaps financially sensible, for something temporarily uncertain or uncomfroable. They did this becuase they saw this as taking them closer to their mission. Therefore, when living according to your mission, you might choose temporary sacrifice, and if you do, you do so decisively.
Conscious individuals are of conviction. They are committed to ideas, values, or ways of life and they’re not afraid to take a stand for things. Think of leaders of the civil rights movement, or anyone who’s advocating for something in which they believe — they decide to do or stand for what they feel is right, at the risk of being unpopular at first. Or, relevant in today’s world — regardless of whether or not it will yield them follows or likes. 😋 This is because they’re not guided by popular opinion — they are self aware enough to have an inner guiding compass (see point #2).
Rather than sit on a fence, conscious leaders treat others, employees, animals, strangers, and people who may not be able to give them any return or benefit, etc. according to their values and morals — there is consistency in their principles, and decisiveness in their actions and execution.
There is a genuine charisma about people who don’t waver on things that are important them. So, what is important to you?
4. Conscious leaders understand that life is ever-evolving
Leaders in life and in business understand that life is fluid and dynamic, and ever changing. Because of this, rather than be swept away, hoping that the tide turns, leaders take ownership of their OWN ride — they take ownership of their own development and evolution.
Most people, if not all, at the top of their fields have cultivated the practice of continuing to develop themselves. Statistics show that almost 90% of the world’s top leaders and experts in their fields are coached — by multiple coaches. Richard Branson attributes his earliest success in part to his coach. When one of my best friends was ready for change — real change — he used three credit cards to afford his coach. The next year he made a million within three months. When leaders work with coaches and mentors, they start being enveloped and supported in a micro-environment in which there is one purpose: developing and strengthening them, and making them proactive players in in an ever changing world and economy — making them leaders.
Oprah said that all her life she’s asked to be used in whatever which way she could serve and contribute the most. Through her fluid and transformative career, she has been a news anchor, on the radio, host of her own syndicated show, owned her magazine, and so much more. And she’s also stumbled along the way. Oprah and other leaders often see themselves as belonging to something bigger — sometimes they take hits, and other times things have to naturally end for the next phase to begin. Having a keen understanding of the fact that there is an ebb and flow to life helps us manage, and even thrive, in times of change.
I know, there is discomfort that comes with growth and changes. But intentional growth — taking ownership of your development as a leader in your personal and professional life, makes us stronger, which in turn makes us better equipped for the future.
In reflecting back on your own life so far, can you see that there was always a story, a character development, or a process of transformation and unfolding, even if you couldn’t see it at the time? By understanding that there is a fluidity to life, and that both your own life and this world at large is always in a state of transformation, perhaps we can start feeling comforted. Nothing is static, everything newer and better is always possible, so long as we dive in and choose ourselves to be the most conscious leaders we can be.
At the heart of it all, showing up as a leader is as professional as it is intimate, as profound as it is mundane. Leadership is the reason why you learned values and morals as a child, why you were inspired at one point toward a career path or of emulating someone, and why you had a community of support — from your favourite teacher, to your sports coach, to those who raised you. The fact that leadership exists in the world is the reason why you were guided and encouraged and shaped the way you were. This was by those who came before you.
And conscious leadership, in turn, is the reason why you’ll make the impact that you will in your life, for those who come after you. 💛
[Ways to connect with me, the blogger]
Instagram: @theLillyWang