How to Wrap 2021 up with a Pretty Bow! - Lilly Wang
We can’t start a new year until the old one is cleared with. Most people WANT a better future, but are held back by guilt, shame, embarrassment, from their past. Most of this is at the subconscious level, which makes changing the habit of living in the past harder, BUT, we can start changing this habit around by using this one simple 3-part tool.
THE “WHY” (WHY WE DO THIS):
We can’t start a new year until the old one is cleared with. Most people WANT a better future, but are held back by thoughts and feelings involving guilt, shame, and embarrassment, from the past. Most of this is at the subconscious level, which makes it harder to change the habit of living in the past, BUT, we can start changing this habit around by using this one simple 3-part tool.
PART ONE
WHAT DID YOU DO WELL IN THIS PAST MONTH?
Tips and tricks:
Jot down ANYTHING and EVERYTHING you can think of, and if a thought like “how is that even important enough to jot down,” comes up, please understand that that is the voice of ego and judgment. What we want to do is to BYPASS this ego and judgment voice, and actually honour, praise, and feel good about ourselves.
When I took my group students through this exercise, I did something different - I did the exercise right then and there too! One of my bullet points went like this “I’m so happy I bought my favourite lip chap that ran out weeks ago when Sephora went on sale at 20% off. I’m frugal and awesome!”
Anyone who’s busy (or anyone who has ADHD) can certainly relate to how cool it is to actually manage to restock on a necessity while there is a sale going on.
But for many of us and most of the time, we can’t acknowledge that something like that would have been something that “we did well” this past month. Right?
Again, this is because we have been conditioned to judge, doubt, and denounce ourselves. So, no more of that. Let’s learn to acknowledge ourselves!Jot down your list and LET THE BRAIN JUICES FLOW. Just keep writing!
I would recommend at least 10+ items for this month.
Start each item or bullet point with “I’m so proud of myself/happy with myself for…” or some variation thereof.
Make your items both tangible (e.g. "I want to increase my earnings by 130%"), and intangible ("I want to be of more integrity," or "I want to meet cool new people this year").
Other examples for this section:
I’m so proud of myself for having asked my boss if I could take on more responsibility at work
I’m so proud of myself for having shown compassion to my friend when xyz happened
I’m so happy with myself for having gotten my LLC and made my business official
I’m so happy because I committed to hiking every weekend this month
Your turn,
PART TWO
WHAT DID YOU DO WELL IN THIS PAST YEAR?
PART THREE
WHAT WOULD YOU LOVE TO DO, ACCOMPLISH, AND FEEL THIS UPCOMING YEAR?
The reason I’m getting you to do this part last is because you’re now able to approach this question with lighter, kinder, and more self-loving energy.
You see, every thought you have about yourself, your life, and the world around you is creating and manifesting your life (and our shared world) as we speak. So if you were to will yourself to set goals for 2022 while under shame, embarrassment, or self deprecation, then you might create the success you want, but this might be through the experience of stress and anxiety and self doubt.
But there is a better way -- if you were to set your goals for 2022 while under more self-acknowledgement, self-praise, and self-love, then you would have an easier, more joyful, more abundant experience in creating the success and growth and abundance that you’re seeking for 2022.
That is the difference between forcing ourselves through our goals and through life, and CREATING our lives.
So, with that said, please jot down all that which you want to do, accomplish, feel, and experience, this year.
Three tips, yet again:
Gift yourself the discipline to allow yourself to write that which you want. If you were to judge and doubt yourself, ALLOW IT TO PASS. You are not here to judge and doubt yourself.
Follow your instincts and write down what you want!
Let the brain juices flow, jot down anything and everything that comes to mind. Even if it were to be a stream of consciousness, allow it to flow through you!
And remember, jot down at least 10+ or more items for each section, and make them tangible (e.g. I want to get 5 more vendors) and intangible ("I want to be more present").
Thank you,
If you enjoyed this blog, you might want to join me for my New Years Instagram Live on Sunday January 2. (Follow me here to get the notification of the live on Sunday!). I'll be talking about how to start your new year strong at 6pm Alberta time (that's 5pm PST, 7pm CST, and 8pm EST). Hope to see you there!
National Truth and Reconciliation Day 2021 - YBB Community Resource Guide
September 30th is a day to recognize and commemorate the legacy of residential schools where tens of thousands of First Nations children were tragically taken from their families and forced to attend classes that separated them from their culture.
September 30th is a day to recognize and commemorate the legacy of residential schools where tens of thousands of First Nations children were tragically taken from their families and forced to attend classes that separated them from their culture.
By coming together as a community we’re happy to share & bring awareness on ways to learn, Indigenous owned businesses to support, where to donate & a list of diverse accounts to follow!
Where to Learn
Read the Truth and Reconciliation Call to Action here.
Sign up for the U of A Indigenous Canada Course. This is a Massive Open Online Course (MOOC) from the Faculty of Native Studies that explores Indigenous histories and contemporary issues in Canada.
Attend workshops at kinSHIFT, which is an Indigenous-led initiative supporting settlers to gain the knowledge and skills to cultivate respectful relationships with Indigenous peoples and places.
Read Books like Five Little Indians by Michelle Good here.
What to Watch
Chief Robert Joseph shares his experience as a residential school survivor and the importance of truth and reconciliation in Canada. Watch CBC’s We are All One Video here.
Every Child Matters: Reconciliation - Act Two. This video includes stories to educate yourself on the history of residential schools and the history of the Metis People. At 17:50 Rosie Darling, a 5 year old from Winnipeg tells “her story” when she explains to her friends what it means to be Metis. It’s a fantastic story for young children to relate to and learn from.
More video resources for children that we found insightful include: The Word Indigenous Explained by CBC Kids News , How to be an ally to Indigenous Peoples in Canada by CBC Kids News.
Where to Donate
Where to Shop
Another great way to shop is through buyauthentic.ca
Who to Follow
Community Submissions by YBB Connect.
Bell Let's Talk | Useful tips & where to seek help in Edmonton!
Bell, Let’s Talk. In addition to our video where we encourage you to share your own stories, we’ve teamed with Brandi Gruninger (founder of Evolution Psychology) and Jamie Bay, Head of Wellness at YBB and Founder of The Wellness Warrior, are taking us through their tips and tricks for mental health coping strategies and a list of go-to resources when you need help!
Bell, Let’s Talk. In addition to our video where we encourage you to share your own stories, we’ve teamed with Brandi Gruninger (founder of Evolution Psychology) and Jamie Bay, Head of Wellness at YBB and Founder of The Wellness Warrior, are taking us through their tips and tricks for mental health coping strategies and a list of go-to resources when you need help!
Tips in the moment: I’m struggling, I’m feeling overly anxious, depressed, or totally stressed out! What can I do RIGHT NOW?
Change your body temperature. Get into a hot shower or step outside in the cold.
Try deep, diaphragmatic breathing or square breathing.
Practice a progressive muscle relaxation.
Hold an ice cube in your hand for as long as possible. This is particularly good for preventing self harm.
Sun salutation (quick yoga flow).
Journal three things you are grateful for.
Visit nature – even if it’s the backyard or a picture of nature will work!
Colour in an adult colouring book or other creative activity such as knitting, painting, or doodling.
-Brandi, Registered Psychologist
I love the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding technique. This looks a bit different for everyone. If I’m feeling anxious, I look around and find 5 things I see, 4 things I hear, 3 things I feel, 2 affirmations (i.e. I am strong), 1 thing I smell. The things that ground you are different for everyone.
If I’m in a meeting, sometimes I need to simply leave the room and take time to breathe on my own.
Go for a 10 minute run. Moving my body does absolute wonders for my brain and it brings me to a state of calm as soon as I finish.
Touch each of your fingers to your thumb: index, middle, ring, pinky – focus on the sensation and repeat. Another great grounding exercise.
-Jamie, Certified Life Coach
Ok, what about preventative measures that we can do each day so we don’t get to a place where we need quick fixes?
Get into nature! There’s tons of research proving the impactful effects of being in nature on our mental health. If you can’t get there, it can even be a screensaver as opposed to actual nature.
Focusing on your nutrition is so important for your mental health. Also try Try adding vitamins (B12, omegas, magnesium), but don’t restrict your food intake.
Exercise regularly. This doesn’t have to mean cardio, it simply means moving your body. Walking or yoga both have been proven to reduce symptoms.
Have a group of close friends that you can confide in to share struggles with.
Limit caffeine, alcohol, marijuana. All of these can have a negative effect on mental health.
Limiting external comparisons via social media. Try to eliminate anything from your feed that doesn’t make you feel fulfilled! For example, follow body positive feeds as opposed to aspirational, unattainable celebrities.
Brandi, Registered Psychologist
I take time to move my body 6 days a week. By moving my body, I mean taking at least 20-30 minutes to sweat. Anything that gets my body moving will ALWAYS make my mind feel amazing after.
See a psychologist or counselor! I am beyond grateful for the work I’ve been able to do with my psychologist and have learned so much over the years. If you don’t know where to start, I’ve included resources below.
Meditation. I use the app called Insight Timer which is a free app with thousands of meditations. It kicks off my day and gets me completely focused into the present moment. Something that myself and many others have a hard time doing!
Organizational wellness: This one is huge for me. When I take time to prepare my entire week on Sundays – who is cooking what day, when we’re having date night, what I’m wearing each day, when am I blocking time – the impacts are huge. I schedule my life so life doesn’t choose for me.
Create a morning routine. Seriously. I know you’ve heard it a million times but IT WORKS. Each morning I meditate, journal, workout, and learn. It is my favorite time of day and creates an intentionally positive mindset.
Take time to journal. No you won’t see immediate benefits, but YES the benefits are huge. I journal about my gratitudes, what would’ve made yesterday better, what would make today great, and finish with a list of my own goals and dreams.
If you have to take medication, that’s okay too! I was in a very dark place and was SO against taking medication. I had all the negative stigma in my head that it would change who I was and make me a different person. But guess what? It didn’t do any of those things. It simply helped me cope and get out of the hole I had found myself in.
-Jamie, Certified Life Coach
Where can I go to seek help in Edmonton?
In person: Momentum Walk In Counselling offers drop-in, goal oriented counselling and works on a sliding scale meaning, you pay what you can afford to pay. How great is that? They also have various peer support groups and a popular men’s group that runs year round.
In person: We All Believe In You (WABIY). WABIY is an incredible peer support group in our city for anyone struggling with their mental health. Check them out.
Phone: The Adult Crises Response Services (780-342-7777). We’ve heard nothing but great things about the support this line provides to those who need it most.
Phone: Distress Centre (Edmonton/Calgary – 403-266-4357). The Distress Centre is the largest crises call centre in North America and has an incredible group of staff to help anyone in distress.
Youth Text Support: Yes! The Distress Centre event has 24-7 text support for youth. How amazing is that? The number for texting is 587-333-2724.
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