Meet our New Community Brand Partner, The Scotiabank Women Initiative

From advancing diversity and inclusion to structuring capital for your organization to managing your investments, The Scotiabank Women Initiative® is a signature program designed to break down barriers and help women pursue their best professional and financial futures. Our program helps advance women-led businesses through three key pillars: access to capital and tailored solutions, specialized education, and mentorship and advice.

To date, the program has deployed more than $6BN in capital to women-led businesses across Canada and has engaged more than 14,000 women with mentorship and networking opportunities. We continue to keep our program participants informed with resources and expert advice through events co-hosted with valuable partners who know your business. Through The Scotiabank Women Initiative, you can also tap into exclusive offers that will help you drive your businesses forward. In 2022, we launch The Scotiabank Women Initiative Mentor Program, where mentors provide coaching and business advice to mentees at every stage of business growth.

We invite all women and non-binary people to enroll in our program, access tools, resources, and events that aim to break down barriers.

Join the program today.

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This month we’d like to share details about an upcoming opportunity for all business owners & entrepreneurs!

On March 3rd, 2022, StrikeUp brings women-led businesses together for a free digital conference that unites a vision of equity and inclusive economic growth through entrepreneurship.

We’ve personally attended some of the workshops last year and ended up building some amazing connections and learnt so much throughout the day. We hope to see you there and that you gain as much value as we did from attending! - YBB Team

The REAL story intro- What writing a book is actually like…

Have you ever wondered what it’s like to become an author? I can pretty much guarantee you that the idea in your mind is TOTALLY different from reality.

I think of it like this. ——————->

First, I’m excited because over the next few months, we’re going to dive into all the juicy behind-the-scenes of the book-writing process. This was a gigantic project that taught me a lot about myself, brought up ALL my stuff, and required continual uplevel. If you want to write your own book or you’re looking at some other big project, buckle up. It’s worth it and insane all at the same time.

“Why?” 

This is the question most people miss when they start. Why take on that project? Why start that business? Why sell that product? And for me, why on God’s green earth do I want to write a book? 

And it’s a good question. I’m a mom with 2 small-ish kids and a 2-year-old business with a full client load. I host a podcast, I sing at church one weekend a month, and I’m generally busy. Not “busy as a status symbol” busy, but life is full and it’s usually intentional. Which means that if I’m choosing to take on a new project that requires a significant amount of time and energy, I better have a solid reason. Ps. Being that intentional and questioning my motives flies in the face of the impulsivity that often accompanies ADHD. But that’s a story for another day…

Anyway, back to why. Here’s what’s interesting - I met a lot of authors over the last year. A LOT. And a lot of “would-be” authors. And a lot of “I’m in the middle of writing my book and have been for 8 years” authors. And a lot of people who think it would be cool to write a book someday. Guess what separates the ones that do from the ones that don’t? 

A part of it is this - the ones that do have a reason why, and that reason is usually bigger than their ego. Here’s what that looked like for me: I’d gone on a faith-led journey of walking out of burnout, fear, and a total lack of fulfillment. I’d rediscovered who I was and why I was here, and I moved out of a life that was misaligned with that identity and purpose. I’d stepped into my calling, finding excitement for life again, a sense that what I was doing mattered, confidence and self-worth, and breathing room. There was a process that showed up in that journey, and that process was also changing the lives of my clients in profound ways. But more people needed that clarity and transformation than I could support in a one-on-one capacity. How could I do that? How could I walk massive numbers of people through, step-by-step, that journey of fear to freedom?

A book!

If I wrote a book, I could empower more people to live their purpose and love their lives. To wake up and know what they were doing matters and to be passionate about not only their work but their whole lives. And more people living that way makes the world better, more filled with love, more compassionate, and more just. Well, that’s simple enough right? I’ll sit down and map out that journey, write down a bunch of stuff about each stage, and then I’ll have a book right? That’s cute… and entirely not the case. And this is where it can either turn into a “something I’ll do one day” or an actual commitment. Guess what happened? I put a tab in my task manager named “Book”, added a few tasks, and pushed their due dates continually for about 6 months. I fell right into the camp of “I should do that at some point… I’ll wait until I feel REALLY called and then I’ll do it.” 

photo cred: Emilie Iggiotti

It’s embarrassing, but true. Coach Juli, who is living her calling and continually stepping through fear and getting out of her own way, got in her own way and let fear drive. How could I write a book about empowerment if I was still getting stuck? Who would want to read it anyway? What if I wrote it and people thought it sucked? 

“Why” isn’t enough on it’s own because of FEAR. At the core of it, I loved the idea of being an author. I loved the idea that I could spark and support more people. But I was scared. I would have told you that I was scared it would take too much time and energy (which was true, but not the main thing). Or that I needed to learn more to make sure I was equipped to do this (which was an excuse). Or that my business needed to be more stable first (also an excuse). But really I was scared of failure and rejection. 

As it happens fear of social rejection is the #1 fear people have, period. And it was up in my face. So I let myself be distracted for a while. It’s easier to be distracted than lean into the discomfort after all. But that couldn’t hold - because I did have a why. 

In September of 2021, I had an opportunity to participate in a 5 day “Map Your Book Out” challenge that one of my author friends was speaking at. I wanted to support him so I popped on for a few sessions, downloaded the worksheets, and tried to put together an outline. And that’s when I realized how tough this was going to be. 

Let me explain. My thought process pretty much looks like this —————->

So despite my client work, guiding people through a journey largely by intuition and feel (and definitely not a consistent linear path), I was faced with trying to put everything I do in some kind of order. I wrote ideas on the planning pages. I rearranged those pages all over my office floor. I sat and stared at them. I added ideas. I stared at them some more. I got frustrated and walked away. I came back and added more ideas. I rearranged them again. I got frustrated again. And then decided to start over and plan on the computer. I figured, maybe if I tried something that’s a system, it might work better for my brain. This is normal for me - you should see me write a talk. Anyway, it was like living in a brain that’s imploding from too much input and not enough capacity to organize the information.

Eventually, I sorted it out, found a system that worked for me, and mapped something out that resembled a book outline. It would change about 86 times between that point and publishing, but I had a start. And then, like the time I left my 500k/year real estate business in the dust because I got the “Go Now!” from God, I got a “Drop everything and write the book”.

SIDENOTE: The nudges or pulls in your soul to go after something often come with opportunities to take a step if we watch for them.

Now, I’m a service-based entrepreneur, and all service-based entrepreneurs know that the most important thing we do (other than taking care of existing clients) is finding new clients. I had a plan for that October to be networking and relationship building. I’d signed up for all the events I could find, planned and advertised a masterclass, and set up a bunch of coffees. My social media was planned out. My newsletters were planned out… It was going to be an epic month for my business and the people I would have the chance to serve. And all that planning meant that “Drop everything and write the book” was met with an “Are you kidding me?!?” 

I also knew though, from experience over the last few years, that when I’m called it’s better to not fight with God. So I dropped everything. I missed events. I postponed coffees indefinitely. I cancelled my masterclass (that one hurt my pride and I mulled it over for days before I pulled that trigger). I cleared my schedule as much as possible and built “no for now, but not forever” boundaries. And then I signed myself up for book writing Bootcamp because I know that I need accountability and deadlines to move on things. I also needed to be in an environment where I would be continually brought back to “what’s the next step?” Instead of focusing on the big picture that was TOTALLY OVERWHELMING at that point in time. Yup, even coaches need coaches. 

And then the writing began. Which is where we will (likely) pick up next month. Stay tuned, that process included a lot of time, tears, wasted time, and imposter syndrome. 

Xoxo,

Juli

Written by: Juli Wenger

Author of Fired-Up, Fulfilled, And Free

Follow Juli at @juliwenger

————

What if you could ditch fear, leave “not-enoughness” and “too muchness behind,” and answer the questions “who am I?” and “why am I here?”

What would it be like to live a life that you know matters? To have real fulfillment? To confidently and fearlessly step into the purpose you were created for?

This book is a roadmap back to yourself and a guide to help you get out of your own way so you can live that purpose with fearless confidence. To help you step out of your patterns and your commitment to not-enoughness. To be reminded that you are worthy because God put you on this earth and He makes you worthy. There is an assignment for you that can’t wait any longer.

This is your invitation into a life that is Fired-up, Fulfilled, and Free.

How Your Ego Is Getting In Your Way! - Juli Wenger

Photo Credit: Christina Louise

Have you ever tried to make a change or create a new habit only to realize that after just a few days you're feeling so much resistance that you're ready to just give up?

Well, say hello to your ego. No, no, not the “I think I'm the bomb.com” kind of ego. The ego I'm talking about is your sense of self, your perceptions, and your “programming”. 

Our ego is made up of all of our upbringing, conditioning, and the “rules” we have learned along the way about how to be loved and accepted in the world - how to get our needs met. And ultimately it's about ONE thing - keeping you SAFE, which in ego talk means staying the same and staying in your comfort zone. 

This is why making a change often comes with A LOT of internal pushback. It’s your ego trying to keep you in the same seemingly comfortable place that you've always been. It keeps you repeating the same old patterns on auto-pilot, so when you disrupt a pattern, you better believe your ego is gonna show up and have something to say about it!

This is where that feeling of being “stuck” comes from. You're thinking new thoughts and attempting new things while your ego is holding up a big red stop sign and screaming “Danger! Danger!” because this newness is not part of your programming. It feels unsafe to your ego EVEN IF it is the right thing for you. 

If you are stuck in your stuckness, let me be very clear…you’re not feeling stuck because you are weak, or not good enough, or not confident enough or not brave enough. You’re feeling stuck because there is literally a tug-of-war going on between your conscious mind (the part that wants to change and knows it’s right) and your subconscious mind (where your ego and self-protective patterns live). 

Photo Credit: Christina Louise

We DEEPLY desire transformation. That's consistent for all of us. We all want to be our best and most joy-filled selves. So we try and try to create change, only to fail more than we succeed.  And every time we fail, we give ourselves proof that this BS belief that WE ARE a failure is true. (psych term = confirmation bias) But here’s the really sh*tty part, we take that failure on as an identity. 

But your performance is not a direct line to who you are. Your performance is a reflection of your ego and subconscious patterns that are trying to keep you safe and the same. Your identity exists above all of that. 

So the question then becomes - beyond my ego fears, who am I? What is my identity?

And to answer that, we have to start interacting with our fears, patterns, “limiting beliefs”, and stories, which in and of itself can be scary, especially if you’ve never done it before because choosing not to believe them anymore goes against how we've learned to function up until now. (Remember: NEW = SCARY to the ego) It brings up a fear that we humans have been conditioned to listen to that says…"stay safe", “don't rock the boat”, “what will they think?” It's really easy to get stuck here and convince yourself that it is safer to not draw attention to yourself, to not make other people uncomfortable, to not make the change… That's defaulting into old ways of being - aka living your life on autopilot. 

No shame here. It's a choice that SO many people make because the process of UNLEARNING and choosing new beliefs, well, it's hard. And autopilot seems easy. That is, when you don't factor in the pain of staying the same anyway. But God calls us to much more than just living on autopilot. He calls us to move beyond all that stuff and be rooted in our identity and purpose. 

Here’s the thing, we all have a history. We all have a past. We all have things that have happened to us, some big moments that we may be able to look back at, and combinations of small moments that built up over time. Regardless, we've all built patterns around those moments. We've put up walls. We've created defences. And now your ego is holding on to those patterns for dear life and convincing you that those patterns are you, and that your identity is found in your patterns. (Hint: it’s not true!)

So what do we do? We open our hearts and we get clear on WHO WE ARE, that's what! When we know who we are, our lens on life starts to shift. We can more easily disconnect our behaviour from our value. And then we can start to detach our identity from our behavioural patterns. That's where the soul-searching fun is! (Ok, well, it's mostly fun and also not so fun sometimes, but the transformation gets me all fired up). 

How do you do that? Other than call me, which is totally an option, you need to start to answer this question: Who am I without my roles and titles? When I take them all away, what is left?

Start there. Stay curious. See what comes up. 

Photo Credit: Christina Louise

Submission by:

Juli Wenger, The author of “Fired-up, Fulfilled, and Free - Know who you are. Get out of your own way. Live Your Purpose” (releasing May 31, 2022), a Certified and Internationally Credentialled Coach, Human Ecologist, Speaker, Podcaster, Certified Breathwork Facilitator, and student of the Enneagram. She is devoted to guiding impact-driven humans through their journeys to powerfully and courageously live out their callings. 

www.juliwenger.com

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